Kiyomi Oshima Molin | 大嶋貴代美
“Can you name examples of contradictory expectations your parents have had due to their different cultural backgrounds?”
Please share your answer to Kiyomi’s question in the comment area below.
|Lived in||Japan - the Netherlands - Italy|
|Reading and Writing||⚫⚫⚫⚫⚫|
|Speaks||Japanese - Dutch - English - Italian|
My mom and dad grew up in drastically different socioeconomic environments. My dad never had to worry about money and lived in rich suburbs, my mom was a very poor immigrant. They disagree on a regular basis about conserving, saving money, frugality, even things as small as eating the last couple bits of rice on the plate before the waiter/waitress takes it away. My mom expects me to be more frugal, my dad thinks my mom is way too concerned.
My parents shift between Japanese and Dutch cultures depending on the situation, very often they choose the one that suit their needs better but not really beneficial for me. I’m not traumatized or anything, I think it’s funny and I just accept it. My father expected me to be as successful as he is in a Japanese way, and I failed from his point of view. I don’t think he thinks the same way anymore and I always consider myself as half Japanese and half Dutch. I feel I’m both and neither, and I’m happy to be what I am and to have such wonderful parents.
My father being from Kyushu was quite strict and heavily focused on my studies.
My mother wasn’t so much; she is always the one laughing and hugging, and more excited about my social life.
In my case, no, because my parents had similar backgrounds. I am a Dutch hafu born and raised in the US. My father’s side were immigrants from the Groningen area and were truck farmers. My mother was born and raised near Tokyo and lived through WWII in Japan. My parents are/were very much alike in that they were raised poor and were hard-working and frugal and valued education. They expected my sister and I to do a good job no matter what it was – people see your character by how you do your job. My sister and I have the same values – and pretty much, so do our quarter kids.